Model Hailey Baldwin had a big weekend—the Bieb’s new wifey shocked fans and sent the Justin Bieber Twitter fandom into overdrive on Nov. 16, when she debuted her new last name in the place where it counts the most: Instagram.

 

 

The former Miss Baldwin made the ultimate commitment, changing her handle from Hailey  Baldwin to Hailey Bieber, with the change not only signalling her undying love for her new beau, but also seemingly confirming the biggest mystery of our lifetime (or at least the past two months)—are they or aren’t they married?!  All Insta clues point to a big fat yes.

According to TMZ, Bieber’s team reached out to the social media platform on November 16  to inquire about “updating” the model’s account. But the name change wasn’t completely out of the blue. Hailey has been slowly ramping up to make the big switch. In October, the model registered to trademark the name “Hailey Bieber.” (She was recently spotted rocking an embossed jacket with the moniker.)

Mrs. Bieber’s name-change comes hot on the heels of further confirmation of their nuptials, with her hubby posting a very loved-up image of the two clasping hands, tellingly captioned: “My wife is awesome.”

 

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My wife is awesome

A post shared by Justin Bieber (@justinbieber) on

 

While I’m all for young love, for some reason, I, unlike many of the Biebs’ fans, didn’t jump for joy when I saw the change pop up on my feed… I just felt kinda weird.

The model is far from the only celeb to co-sign ’till death do us part by taking her spouse’s name. One half of everyone’s favourite former Step Up couple (RIP), Jenna Dewan, took on then-husband Channing Tatum’s last name, becoming Jenna Dewan Tatum both on Insta and IRL. And Kim Kardashian has launched an entire beauty line with her marital initials: KKW Beauty. So why can’t I get on team Mr. and Mrs. Bieber?

 

Uh, the wedding ceremony hasn’t actually happened yet

Maybe this is the simplest explanation. Not that we’re expecting an invite, but is anyone else just a little weirded out that they’re making all these big changes before their actual wedding date? Yes, we all know the point of a marriage is to *be* married, but we also know that this isn’t just some subtle courthouse situation à la Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell; the Biebers are reportedly planning a big bash for all their friends and family (and God). And with their love for big declarations of well… love, these two are anything but subtle. (Recall if you will the Biebs serenading his lady love in London or posting his gushing engagement confirmation.) So the fact that the new Mr. and Mrs. Biebs are taking their sweet time planning their special day feels really out of step with the narrative they’re presenting, and with Bieber’s traditional, church-going ways.

 

It feels like they’re kids playing house

Like, literally playing house.

Bieber and Baldwin are young, just 24 and 21, respectively. While Baldwin has been open about her intention of marrying young, and age *is* just a number, I can’t help but feel like this is all one big game of house for the couple. Their relationship has moved at light-speed; after a brief romance in 2016, they got back together this year—very quickly after breaking up with their previous loves. And of course, there’s the (super) fast engagement and the jet-setting summer of love (filled with lots of tears and begrudging haircuts). When you factor in the fact that most of their big relationship moments, including their engagement announcement, steamy un-captioned thirst traps, the first photo of her massive ring and the are-they-or-aren’t-they nuptials, have played out over social media, it’s hard not to feel like they’re just fronting for the ‘gram.

And while endearing, Justin’s reference to Baldwin as his ‘wife’ in the aforementioned Instagram post feels a little flippant. Their running and anything-but-subtle IG commentary lets *everyone* know that they’re together—after all, it’s hard to misinterpret comment sections filled with sweet cooings like “mine,” and “U turn me on.” ( I also stand by the assertion that anyone who continues to use “U” in messages, is not ready for marriage. @ me.)

 

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You guuys. #CommentsByCelebs

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Okay, that type of performance isn’t anything new, but it does feel inauthentic and forced. Hailey changing her name just feels like the next step in what they think they’re expected to do.

And it’s clear that other people feel a similar way, too. At least if Twitter is anything to go on, with several users equating Baldwin’s name switch to a pre-2010 Bieber fan account. Ouch.

 

 

It makes it all real

I’m by no means a die-hard Selena and JBiebs stan. In fact, knowing absolutely nothing about their relationship outside that which has been provided to me by social media, it seems like they’re probably better off doing their own things. But, that’s enough to make me come to the conclusion that Hailey and Justin just seem like a fluke. Their coupling and engagement came in the same summer that we saw other whirlwind romances take off and then sizzle out (RIP Pete and Ari). And I’d be lying if I said when Pete and Ari didn’t make it down the aisle (Piggy Smalls in tow), I was ready for the same to happen to these two… along with Nick Jonas and Priyanka Chopra, who are set to wed at the beginning of December. Am I a skeptic? 100%. But maybe, the Biebers have proven me wrong. If anything, Hailey’s IG change up has signalled that (at least for now), the couple is in it for the long run. Maybe they’re actually in love. Maybe they will be the couple to make it down the aisle, both figuratively and literally (if they ever get their damn wedding off the ground).

For now, I leave you with this:

 

 

And the hope that if for some reason this doesn’t work out, at least Baldwin won’t have to throw out any monogrammed towels.

 

Related:

A Comprehensive Guide to Cambridge, Ont. (a.k.a. Justin & Hailey’s New Home)
Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin Just Confirmed Their Engagement But We’re Still Not Buying It
Justin Bieber Crying on a CitiBike Is a #Mood

Filed under: Hailey Baldwin, Justin Bieber